Irony is a Cold-Hearted Bitch

I bet that when you look at me, you think "Damn, I know I know him. Where have I seen that classically good-looking, rugged-yet-sensitive profile before?". Okay, maybe not exactly that - but you know I look familiar.

I'm the guy the hero shot while protecting national security and saving the girl at the very same time. Well, I'm one of them anyway. You catch a glimpse of me going down to the sidewalk with blood spraying from three perfect taps right to the heart. It hurts more than you'd think too, when good ol' Mark Herman blasts away with his fake service weapon. They always shoot to kill on that procedural - no chance for repeat appearances or future guest spots.

I was also the probie cop chasing down the bad guys with that lady librarian-turned-detective. You know you saw the movie. I got beaten to death with baseball bats and my death changed the lady librarian-turned-dectective's life. I bet you even felt a little sad when you saw how great a job the make-up chick did making me look dead.

Oh! I always in an episode of Vanished - you know, the one about the people on the plane that went down? I was in a flashback, but my line was cut and I ended up on the floor in the cutting room. Same thing with my appearances on According to Tim and How I Met Your Aunt. Them's the breaks though.

You know you know me though. You've seen me a dozen times or more. I've been in move feature films than Kirsten Drunkst or Orlando Blossom. I've done bits for fifty television shows and more than half of them actually aired.

I drive a 1998 Chevy Cavalier, share a cramped apartment on Vine with four people, work two jobs and still have to make time for auditions and guest spot performances. My Mom is in Arkansas and she's always begging me to come home.

Sometimes I think about it, but I can't leave yet - my agent just called and I'm up for a real part - second lead in a Jessica Pimpsome movie! Hot damn, my star is gonna RISE!